With 2020 coming at us like a bullet train, make time for quiet reflection during the year end amidst all the Christmas and New Year’s Eve parties. If you haven’t been happy with your performance for 2019 or simply overworked and tired out, here are some tips to get your groove back on for the New Year – and perhaps – making a New Year’s resolution that you can actually keep.

Learn to Say No

Say “no” more often – and without guilt. “No” is a sentence. You don’t need to explain and apologise that your (mental) health has become your priority.

Get into Meditation

Meditate daily. The practice allows us to change our perspective and to make better choices – in our home, in our relationships, in our jobs, and in our lives.

Drop Perfectionism

Or learn to manage it better. This double-edged sword has worked for us at certain stages in life and led us to excel, to manage, to succeed. Be wise and notice when your own internal voice that keeps you on your toes constantly has become an abusive partner from within – relentlessly criticizing you, berating you, telling you are not good enough. If you find it difficult to change your internal dialogue, get help. Your sense of self is worth it.

Be Present

We often stay hooked by a story from the past, an attachment or a worry about the future. Notice the moment, notice your surroundings, start paying attention to the now.

Make Room for Gratitude

When we choose to look at what we already have, we see the million hidden blessings in our lives. When we focus on them, we notice a lot more positives surrounding our days. Often the most precious things are those that are not described easily as “aims” or “goals”. A good friendship, a loving partner, an exciting job, a hobby that keeps us satisfied on the weekends, a good meal with a close friend, a beautiful sunset, our favorite drink, a good book – these might be things that we already have in our daily lives but we don’t notice and take them for granted.

Yet these are the reasons and the moments that make our days happy. Thus when we focus on what we have, we discover how good our lives actually are. Even in hardest times, we can look for that one moment in the day that made us calm, that made us smile. And that is something to be grateful for.

Pay Attention to Yourself

You will accomplish much more if you take the time to first pay attention to yourself and your needs.

Get Energised

Choose the type of energy that you prefer to reside in for most of your life. 

Do What You’re Good At

Pay attention to the gifts you have and incorporate them in your life. Even if not as a profession, focus on them as your hobby.

(Social Media) Detox

Make social media detox a regular thing. There is enough research now to convince us that such detox is vital.

Take Responsibility

Take responsibility for your life and your choices.


This article was contributed by Ralitza Peeva, a Counsellor and Life Coach at COMO Shambhala Urban Escape. Armed with a Masters in Counselling and a PhD in Sociology, Ralitza’s approach integrates multiple disciplines and methodology such as Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Solution Focused Therapy, and Client Centred Therapy. She works together with her clients to explore and gain the insights necessary to enable them to lead a fruitful, balanced and fulfilling life.